Do you remember the New Year’s post about my overwhelming moment?
It took me few days of digesting all the emotions and my powerlessness. Therefore, I sat in the quite place and coached myself on that subject.
Firstly , I asked myself following questions:
- What was the root of my emotional burn out?
- What on the journey of completing 2019 goals I forgotten about?
- Am I yet align with my needs?
After a while, the answer came to me like a light in the tunnel. YOU JUST LOST YOURSELF & YOUR CORE VALUES!
With my clients, firstly what we do is: finding out what her core values are. This is the guide, which determine if my client is on the right path and is creating fulfilling goals.
Therefore, most of us would say , it’s simple. My values are my family, health , love and self developing and so on. The question is, how much integrated you are with your values with your daily life? Do you really consider your family and health on daily routine? How much time do you spent at work and on commuting and how much with your family and on your hobbies? What do you do to keep yourself healthy? Do you eat junk food? Do you exercise at all? Do you sleep enough?
These are detailed questions and more you need to ask yourself when you plan your day and life in integrity with your core values. This is also the secret to create fulfilling life.
To clarify, let me explain to you what can go wrong, as the result of not having core values 100% formulated in your life.
In whole my life I was playing the “giver” role. First others needs, then me. It was my hidden motto and old pattern. After I have done, so much work on myself, I new that this must change.After own coaching and therapy it came time , to settle my life strategy for new me. The core values were the fundamental part of it. One of them was the self-care. Holistically I promised myself to protect my needs as the greatest treasure.
This sounded promising. Secondly, I settled my new goals last year, integrated also with my own needs. In fact I forgotten about one thing. While setting my goals in September – November 2019, I didn’t look at my actions precisely. Superficially , all were aligned with my five main core values. The thing is that I haven ‘t looked, if the amount of my goals still meet my life circumstances. And here came the trouble. I wanted so much to fulfill my life purpose, that I lost from my eyes unwritten law. In case of life-changing circumstances, I must be in line with my core values, not my goals! No guild , no regrets. Wait until the rain stops and then you can come back to this what you started.
Here was my root of burn out in the end of the year! I haven’t formulated what exactly self care mans for me. Is it just a 1 hour per day to be with myself? Is it saying “NO” to things which I do not like? Or maybe planning my week ahead and giving myself space to do not complete one of my goals, because I do not feel strong enough to do it?
Sometimes you need to stop running. Take a breath and ask yourself question: Is this still serving me? Are my goals yet align with your core values and life purpose?
Lastly just sit, watch the sky, sunrise, candle (whatever makes you calm) and let it come to you. It will.
What about you? How do you settle your goals? Do you verify them every month and adjust or keep doing everything with no reflection?
Leave me your comment I am happy to hear back from you.
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