Most of moms doesn’t think about returning to work plan, until they face the moment. Did you? I haven’t. I spent lot’s of time on preparing for motherhood. Buying baby clothes, baby chair, preparing room for the big day, but I have never thought that it’s important to make a plan about career too. “I’ll think it later” and the time flied…
Even if you are not planning to go back work for 1 or 2 years like me, the strategy for your career /education should land in your journal too. How much this would make my life easier? I cannot even estimate , but I know what I was going through , when I left that for the last minute. I couldn ‘t figure out where to start. Maybe taking postgraduate course? Or shell I take some dutch lessons? Or maybe I should get somebody to make my CV reviewed? Maybe I should start something else? Change my career? I was a mess!
Therefore, here are my 5 tips how to make your work break & return healthy.
First, find your life purpose. When you are going to stay at home longer, this is best moment to think over your last job. Consider if you liked it at all, or there is willingness in you to explore new areas. Maybe there is a dream from your whole life which you never had time to to look at? This is the moment when you can asked your self: What would I do in my life if the money was not an issue? What are my talents? What could I teach other people? In fact, in most cases maternity break is anyway without any income , so I guess money is not the issue. Everyone has a talent. You too! Lastly, if you know at least 1% more than others , you can already teach them. You don’t know how to answer these questions? Get a coach.
If other mom could do it, you can do it too!
Second, take time to interact with working moms. We tend to stay in our comfort zone. Working mom’s environment feels like it’s different world. As the result, we spent lots of time with non working moms. Stretch your comfort zone. Go to meetup groups and speak to these who could give you some insight on the future challenges you might go through as well. The more data you have , the better plan you can prepare. On top of that, you can make network. Therefore, this brings a big value in the future while searching for a job. And on top of top you might find new lovely friends 🙂 Priceless!
Gratitude your life and yourself!
Next one, write a gratitude journal every day. I have been writing my gratitude journal from 2 years. This is something what helped me to learn than in every single day we can find the good and the love. Hence, after 2 years I can even say that in every single moment, there is something what brings a value to our life. I started from Timothy Ferris 5 minutes journal. After half year I started my own one. I created it my way, adjusted to my needs. Thus, what I can strongly recommend to you is gratitude yourself in it too. You need that!
My number 4 is, spent time with your thoughts and emotions. Learn the mindful work with your body and head. If you let your emotions and negative inner voices overtake you, YOU ARE DONE! You land in the bubble, where all you can see is NO WAY OUT.
- Changing humor like on roller coaster, one minute you are happy, next you start feeling overwhelmed.
- You are constantly tired, with no energy. Some mom’s might explain it as sleepless symptom. If this is all the time, every day, do not take is a grated. It might be first sign of burn out
- Saboteur playing key role in every step you take. “Everything has no sense. I am not able to do it. Why everyone is able to do it, and I am so foolish….” Simply you are playing victim of your life. So, this is not the way I want you to be like. You either!
- You stop seeing people. Because you feel so angry with the situation you are ,then you feel guilty. After feeling guilty you start feeling inner shame.When the shame appears , you start avoiding people and the negative emotions are taking charge of you
- Catastrophizing – oh… this one I can say was the worst. Seeing problems everywhere. Hence, when I started watching my thoughts as every day routine, it become to be even a funny. Where the hell , my dear head you are taking this mumble from?
Abandon attitude I CAN DO IT ALL BY MYSELF!
Lastly, the bottom line.Learn how to ask people for a help. When you organize your family day tasks, make 2 columns. First one is WHAT IS TO BE DONE , second is WHO CAN TAKE CHARGE OF IT. If you want to prove that you are capable to do all by yourself it’s fine. Please just look at the symptoms in tip number 4. This might be effect of ALL BY MYSELF attitude. Take care of yourself. That is the first thing what you need to do as mother. When you hit burn out, the house of cards will fall.
Remember woman you are not alone in this journey. The sisterhood is just right here for you. We can support and empower each other every day!
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